Sermon for the Episcopal Church of St John the Baptist, Capitola,

given by Rev. Eliza Linley/March 30,2008

  The Episcopal Church of Saint John the Baptist welcomes all to worship God and to share

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Sermon

On the southwest coast of India lies a small state called Kerala. As long ago as the time of Moses there was trade in spices and luxury articles between Palestine and this part of the Malabar Coast. During the Second Exile, in 586 BCE, Jews from Palestine came and settled in Kerala, where they were know as Bene Israel. It was to this country that Thomas – the same Thomas – came in the first century to preach the gospel to the Jewish community. Some of them became Christians, called “Nazranis”, or “followers of Jesus of Nazareth”. Today the Mar Thoma Church, the church that Thomas founded, numbers about a million members worldwide. Not bad for a disciple who went down in history as “the doubter”. Once he made up his mind, there was no stopping him.

In our Lenten Series, “The Death of Secularism”, Dave Evans labeled habitual doubt as one of the classic ways we block access to God’s grace. But honest doubt can also be a doorway to faith, rather than its opposite. In fact, maybe doubt needs to be present before faith can be realized. If you haven’t questioned it, how can it be yours? Doubt is the hallmark of an open mind, of scientific inquiry. We are raised to question assumptions in order to find the truth. So why does doubt become prickly once we start talking about God?

It may be that the difference between a doubt that, once resolved, leads to the evangelization of India, and the kind of doubt that stifles grace is a question of motivation. Some people who doubt do so out of a desire to find the truth, even though that truth may take them to a place they’d rather not go. Others’ doubt is motivated by fear, and that’s the kind of questioning that leads to a closed door. Left to our own devices, we cannot imagine how God could love us, let alone forgive us. We look at the galaxies beyond number, the boundless universe, and find it unlikely in the extreme that God could care for us. We look at the scale of tragedy on our own small planet, the wars that will not cease, the specter of global warming, the inexhaustibility of human greed, and paltry gifts seem utterly useless. And so our doubt becomes the barrier to a fullness of believing and faithfulness – a stumbling block rather than the passage to a better understanding of our faith.

But let’s say that doubt is a gift of God. Let’s say it is a tool we’ve been given that can open us up to deeper levels of understanding and closer relationship with God and all of creation. Then we begin to understand that faith and doubt are traveling companions. They are among the many Christian paradoxes – human and divine, with us and transcendent, dead and yet living, creatures of bread and wine and divine presence. And the difference between all of these pairings is that one is the other seen through the lens of resurrection.

So this story of Thomas is about resurrection. Of course, it is. But the resurrection in question is not only that Jesus is risen from the dead. In the gospel passage, the disciples have been hiding all week behind closed doors. Thomas was so burned, or frightened he couldn’t even bring himself to be there with them. They are all living in fear. We all know what that’s like. That’s why Thomas’ story is so poignant – we’ve all been there. It may have been circumstance that put us on the dark side of a locked door, or illness, or addiction – all things that create insecurity and fear. It may be the hurts we’ve felt, or the ones we’ve caused, the relationships we’ve lost. It can be the fear that reinforces prejudice, our resentments or self-righteousness; maybe it’s just plain sin. In any case, it is the human condition. And sometimes we decide that, given the way it is, we just have to live behind those locked doors. It’s too risky to step outside.

But here’s the thing. God didn’t wait for the door to be opened. This time Jesus didn’t stand at the door and knock. He walked right through the locked door. And then he came back again to bring Thomas, the lost sheep, back in to the fold. This story is a retelling of the Easter message. On Low Sunday we learn that a locked door is not enough to keep the living God out. Jesus didn’t wait for the disciples to decide they might not be hunted down and murdered. He didn’t wait for Thomas to stop doubting. He doesn’t wait for us to give up our fears, our resentments, our addictions. Jesus is already in the house. Whatever it is in about ourselves that we thought was impossible to fix – we cannot do it ourselves; we cannot do it alone, but God is already at work within us. That’s why we’re here on Low Sunday. And the resurrection story that starts with Jesus becomes the story of Thomas’ resurrection into faith, of the disciples’ resurrection into action, of our own resurrection into new life and hope.

Doubt can be the crucifixion of our preconceptions, of a faith that has outlived its usefulness, of a God who is not big enough. Because God is not dead, doubt can lead to the crucifixion of the false self. But the resolution of doubt is not the end of the story.

It would have been wonderful to be there to see Jesus as the disciples and Thomas did, to be sitting at the table when he walked into the room. But we who believe have eyes to see the face of Christ all around us all the time. We do not believe because we see, we see because we believe.

If we think this reading is just about faith and doubt and leave it at that, we’re missing the most important part. “As the Father has sent me, so I send you”. The disciples, and we, are commissioned for service. 1 Peter says, “to rejoice with an indescribable and glorious joy, sharing these gifts with everyone we encounter.” We are witnesses to the resurrection. We have received the power of the Holy Spirit. We believe that God is still renewing all creation. May our doubts lead us into deeper communion with the One who makes all things new, and lives of joyful service.